Keeping myself busy

2hrs of waiting then 3 come at once.......
Monday, May 30, 2011

Maybe I am being given a very subtle hint that blogging isnt for me. I think the nickname calamity is probably well deserved. I am getting the hang of this system now though so my apologies to anyone who had to read my last post 3 times. I feel such a fool but honestly this is what my life is like, I dont seem to be able to do anything right and spend days apologizing for my actions, I am about as embaressed now as I was in the changing room from hell.

So I am off to the kitchen to look in the oven. !!

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keeping busy working out how to post follow up to keeping busy
Monday, May 30, 2011

Well I am plodding on with my little venture, making my lovely chains for spectacles and I have had loads of response since my last blog, I haven’t sold any chains but I have had loads of thumbs up for the blog. I didn’t think anyone would read it and I was really surprised. Thanks everyone for taking the time to read it. I am now donating part of the profits from the chains to the local animal charity, needless to say with my sales to date they aren’t planning any major improvements to the shelter ......but from little acorns. And thanks to everyone who is donating their old broken dress jewellery and stuff with beads on, I am so grateful, keep it coming. I was even given a fab pair of sandals with loads of beads on so don’t restrict yourself to just jewellery.

Following on from what a difference a day makes, I have to accept that less than 5 years ago I was a 50 something single ‘cougar’ having a whale of a time.............now, well, now I am a whale with the speed of a cougar through constantly having to chase my own tail ! In fact come to think of it the only real resemblance I have to a cougar nowadays are the every growing whiskers and rapidly expanding feet with claw like toe nails.

But old habits die hard, I still feel the need to apply a coat of mascara before putting on me coat....... so to speak. In the old days I guarantee you I could not have a sensible conversation with out my mascara, honest to god speech evaded me until I had applied at least 5 coats of Max Factor, a spit and polish type mascara, for those of you old enough to remember it was in a little blue case and you had to spit on the brush then rub it over the rock hard block of gunky mascara until there was sufficient on the brush to coat your lashes. A very long and tedious task but the end results were rather spectacular, especially if you favoured the Dusty Springfield look. But in retrospect and in these days of health and safety I don’t think it was a very clean way of achieving long luscious lashes, although again in retrospect maybe a bit of spit with its added nutrients did my lashes the world of good, come to think of it they must be the only part of my body to have remained the same over the years. It was a fabulous product though and always gave me the added confidence to look someone straight in the eye and say what I had to say. There were exceptions however, as with everything and it was not advisable to have a conversation whilst checking on anything cooking in the oven, the whoosh of heat upon opening the oven would hit you straight in the face forcing you to slam tight your eyes for a second, but even this briefest of moments was long enough to begin a melting process of the mascara which turned it into a sort of eyelash superglue and the end result was very embarrassing. I would spend the next 5 minutes trying to continue the conversation in an intelligent manner whilst at the same time trying to prize my eyes apart one at a time. This used to happen so often my husband used to say go ask the ‘winker' in the kitchen. Well I think that was what he said.

At times despite knowing better, I also feel the need to don high heels once again. Not that often, but as I am only 5’2 ½” on a good day I sometimes need to make myself visible and by making myself taller and wearing the 5 coats of mascara, I do just that, it’s as if I suddenly re-appear to the world and get noticed. But, not always for the right reasons, as this usually turns into a fiasco because I just can’t manage to walk in them for any length of time anymore. I get about as far as the fruit and veg aisle in Carrefour and have to admit defeat and put them in my bag, or better still I carry them around pretending the heel has broken, (yep on both.........at the same time.............just don’t make them like they used to !) but for those of us old enough to remember Billy Dainty there is distinct resemblance between me and him walking in heels , especially if I am wearing leggings !!! God forbid, if anyone ever sees me in high heels and leggings please contact the appropriate authorities there and then.

I actually don’t go shopping very often these days. I feel I should but the need is no longer there, who do I need to impress up on this mountain, the dogs and the kids certainly don’t mind if my shoes don’t match my bag or my top doesn’t hide my ever increasing lumps and bumps. Talking of which, tops that is, not lumps and bumps, my last outing to the shops with my little girl ended in disaster when I went in a particularly nice boutique which was having a sale, all i wanted was a nice little strapless top to hide those little lumps and bumps which I mentioned before that no-one cares about except me. I must have been in there an hour at least and everyone was getting fed up, including me, when hey presto I found it, a really pretty little top that could have been made for me, I went in and tried it on. In, I might mention.... the changing room from hell !!!!! do you know I couldn’t even bend over to pull my leggings up unless I put my head out through the curtains and pretended I was looking for my little girl, (did I just say leggings............sorry Jeans ) so anyway I digress..........seem to do that a lot these days too......sign of old age maybe.............or just no-one to talk to on the mountain so it all comes out in an incomprehensible stream of drivel at times............back to that top, it fitted perfectly and did just what I wanted it too, so I went out into the shop which by now had several irate ladies queuing up to get into that changing room though why some of them were even considering it I don’t know, I thought I had problems , reminds me of the day I sat opposite an enormous lady in the hairdressers and was squeezing my 5 year olds hand as hard as I could because I just knew he would say something..........and lo and behold he didn’t, I was so relieved I eased the pressure on this little fingers probably just in the nick of time as they were beginning to change colour and I breathed a sigh of relief only for him to say “See Mummy, I never said that lady was fat did I ?” Children eh....bless ‘ em. So there I was admiring myself in the mirror, pretty little strapless top hanging nicely over my lumps and bumps and the assistant said, “Excuse me madam, but that’s not meant to be worn like that “ must admit she stumped me there, I had, I admit, in the past put tops on back to front.......but not in this shop and I had checked the label was at the back before I put it on and the neckline wasn’t around my navel or any other part o;f my anatomy which it shouldn’t have been around..............”Why” I asked in all innocence .”Because Madam that is a SKIRT” she said through a mouth well used to sucking lemons. The look of sympathy she gave my little girl was priceless. I was mortified of course but my little girl had been damaged for life, to her it was the ultimate humiliation and I am now banned from shopping until I can get a grip. She was not amused and definitely viewed it as a mortal sin rather like my son who never has recovered from that day over 20years ago when I took him into Burtons in Bristol and asked for a pair of Elephant Cords. Well, easy mistake, the sales assistant knew what I meant and once he had stopped the dribbling brought on by his uncontrollable giggles he showed us some lovely jumbo cords, well I say us but it was just me in fact as my 13yr old son had by this time disappeared and was on his way back to the multi storey car park muttering. He went in the army not long after that.

So better go and get ready for Britains Got Talent now, wonder if could build an act around making spectacle chains, well there’s a thought.... Dusty Springfield eyes.... Billy Daintys legs.....wearing the wrong clothes at the wrong time, making the wrong things at the wrong time, sounds perfect for me.

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What a difference a day makes !
Monday, May 16, 2011

There I was happily working away enjoying my single life in Spain and all the advantages that brings, when a chance encounter on the internet..........yeh I know (no fool like an old fool !) changed my life forever. I went from being in control of my destiny to being in control of a whole tribes destiny and boy have I had my work cut out. But, before I go on I have to say it was the best decision I ever made and anyone who knows me will probably agree. Being single has its advantages obviously but I was not happy, I was lonely and however much work I had, however much social life I could enjoy something was missing. So after this chance encounter I was introduced to the most adorable children in the world and fell in love instantly. Never being one to think things through too much I made a snap decision and gave everything up to move in with them. They had a particularly tragic background and I felt drawn to them. Nearly 4 years later I am still here living quite an isolated life on a mountain with my little tribe around me. I LOVE it. Despite everyone saying I was mad, all the usual warnings ´´why on earth do you want to do that at your age´´ ´ýou´ve got such a great social life´´ blah, blah, blah I have no regrets and I certainly feel much more contented and fulfilled now than I have for a long, long time, we laugh a lot, we cry a lot but its all worth it. I did find it quite a culture shock and the paella room is now full of racks of designer shoes and suits which will never see the light of day again, but I still like to sit and look at them sometimes. These days its all flip flops and loose dresses really, am toying with the idea of a straw hat too just to complete the image but dont know if I can go quite that far yet. Think it finally hit home when I made jam - me making jam ! I used to have problems finding the kitchen let alone using it. I remember my sons (my own son) first visit to Spain years back, he rushed to the fridge as he was starving and was horrified to find it only contained nailvarnish and my make up bag ! I never quite got the knack of being domesticated in those days. But I have worked at it and now although I say it myself I am pretty good.

But, with all this time on my hands I have had to find other things to stimulate my brain cells, I sell Avon and thats quite a feat living where I do, I certainly have to go out and find my customers, there is no walking down the street ringing door bells, sometimes I have to stand at the end of a very long drive shouting out ´´Ding Dong Avon Calling ´´ doesnt always get me the response I wanted but thats life, no sense of humour some people ! And I go out to Ladies Luncheons and fayres to tout my wares. I recently won an award for top sales and was recognized at a presentation dinner held by Avon, that was a really nice feeling after being on the mountain for these past few years and only being recognized by the dogs, guinea pigs and lizards !

My latest venture is designing and making beaded chains-lanyards for spectacles and sunglasses. I did this because I couldnt find any in the shops around here, to be honest its not easy to find the shops around here let alone chains! But I think there is a gap in the market and I have put my artistic skills to use and started making these really quite interesting chains. To this end I have also developed a website (with the help of a very kind friend who has the technical brain, I am just the artistic one) and doing this has got the old grey matter going and it feels good. The website is www.beadedchains.moonfruit.com if you would like to have a look. Bear in mind this has been done by a complete novice (me ) so for anyone else looking to make a website but with no knowledge it can be done. I have had frustration after frustration and felt like a complete idiot so many times doing this but got there in the end. Making the chains is very time consuming but I find it theraputic and can go into a little world of my own whilst making them, reminds me of when I was a little girl and my Dad taught me the art of tying flies for fishing, I would spend hours making my own particular fly, my poor dog had endless bald patches where I would take his hair to use in my designs and pinch my mums beads to make the eyes, so maybe I was destined to do something like this. Both you and my dogs can rest assured that I dont use hair in these designs but I am always on the look out for old beads and broken jewellery if anyone wants to donate.

WelI I dont know if I am doing this blog as I should, I dont know if anyone is even reading it, but its been good for me to start writing some things down. I have had such good times here and silly little things have happened which have made me laugh more than I have in years. Incidents with rats, lizards, bees, no electricity, no water, too much water, forest fires, helicopters over pool taking water the list goes on and will continue going on as my life is certainly never dull now. I would not go back to the life I had for anything, in my opinion it was false - this is about as real as it can get and hopefully its rubbed off on me. What you see is what you get. That cant be so bad can it ?

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