In our house in Norfolk we are lucky if we get an internet speed of 2.0mbs. I have just had fibre optics fitted to the telephone system in the villa in Spain by Movistar and we get anything now from 62 to 96 mbs!! Fantastic! The engineers worked tirelessly all morning and left myself and my lady very happy. I gave them both a copy of 'The Wednesday Women', even though neither of them can speak or read English!!! So the deal is, we get phone line, super-fast internet, 101 TV channels, my mobile, my lady's mobile, all for 72€ per month (about £49).
I am often saying on this blog that Spanish drivers can be very annoying. Today one came at me, and waved a fist at me, because I had the temerity to be driving the correct way down a one way street whilst he was coming the wrong way up it! The mind boggles. Apparently also Spanish drivers are taught to keep to the INSIDE lane when turning at a roundabout. In other words, bearing in mind we drive on the right over here, if you are going to turn left at a roundabout you should take the right hand lane, cutting across traffic that is going to continue straight on. Madness! Although I have often thought that their rule about putting hazard lights on is a good one, and should be tried in the UK....... A Spaniard thinks that if he leaves his hazard lights on he can park literally ANYWHERE. Pedestrian crossing, blind corner, double park, anywhere. As I am a part-time immigrant here I am very grateful that they are so courteous in their acceptance of me, and other Brits, but their driving and parking leaves a lot to be desired.
Yesterday a friend phoned us up and told us we had to get to our Spanish bank immediately and show them our passports, and other ID. Apparently this was the last day that we could do this under the anti-money laundering and terrorist movement of money legislation passed in 2010. There has been no publicity about it, nor did our bank advise us of the requirement. Had we not done this our account would have been frozen, which would have meant that no standing orders would have been paid. Lucky that we had a concerned friend who by chance was in her bank in a very large queue and was told by a passing 'teller' whom she knew.
Today, is 'Workers of the World Unite Day', here in Spain. All the shops are closed. Except for bars and restaurants. To compensate all the shops are open on Sunday when they would usually be closed. Summer opening, which means 7 days a week starts in June.
My friend, who has a son in boarding school, just sent me an email, she said her son was going to spend today 'licking the nuts off of a large Neapolitan'. I have no answer to that.....
My pal told me that the Election Debates on television are very interesting. Luckily we subscribe to 'Netflix'. Apparently the UKIP man has a very good head for money, theres a long slit on the top. Labour's Ed Miliband was seen practising his tight-rope walking last night, Clegg has just remembered he has been against the Tories all this time, and Cameron is exceptional at swerving. Well, that's what my neighbour says. I'm above politics. I think we should have a dictator.....me.
Last year I had my mobile phone in my shorts and, caught up in the fun of having my grandchildren splashing around in the pool, I dive-bombed the boy, with my mobile still in my pocket. When I got out I told my lady what I had inadvertantly done. "Was it switched on?" she asked. "Yes," I replied. "You're bloody daft! You should have switched it off before you jumped in."
When he was very little my son asked me if I and his Mummy had sexual relations. A bit surprised and embarrassed I answered, " Er, yes, we do." He then said brightly, "Great! Can we go and visit them sometime?"
Around the same time my daughter, who was about five, told me, "I would get pregnant if I could be assured I'd have puppies."
Bye for now.