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Only Joe King

A light-hearted look at life in Andalucía and Spain in general. Its good points and its bad. This blog doesn't pull any punches.

Sayings on Fridges, on T-shirts and on the Web
Sunday, December 4, 2022 @ 5:41 PM

Only Joe King has written recently about mottos and quotes on sugar packets, in pubs and bars, in loos and in the office.

In this third article in the series, he focuses on fridge magnets, T-shirts and the world wide web.

 

Fridge magnets

Fridge magnets are not just tourist knick-knacks, boasting about where you’ve been, eg “I love Frigiliana”, what you are/were, “Aquí vive un profesor”, or which football team you support, “Aquí vive un hincha del Barça”, it’s also the source of witty sayings, truisms and sound advice:

 

“SIT LONG

TALK MUCH

AND

LAUGH OFTEN!

 

“Never go to bed MAD or HUNGRY!”

 

Warnings:

 

“¡Hasta el 40 de mayo no te quites el sayo!”

[“Don’t shed your woolly till the 40th May” (ie 9th June, when summer is deemed to start in southern Spain). It is similar to the English expression “Cast ne’er a clout, till may be out” where may, by the way, refers to the blossom, not the month.]

 

“Quien quita la aceituna antes de enero, deja el aceite en el madero.”

[“If you pick your olives before January, you’re leaving oil in the tree.”]

 

“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.”

 

„Ich bin nicht kompliziert, sondern eine Herausforderung.“

[I’m not complicated; just a challenge!]

 

„Widersprich niemals eine Frau. Warte bis sie es selber tut.“

[Never contradict a woman. Wait till she does it herself!]

 

On a fridge magnet corkscrew:

“WINE improves with age;

I improve with WINE!”

 

And this witty observation on the passage of time:

“¡OTRA VEZ LUNES!

Menos mal que

el día siguiente a

pasado mañana

ya es la víspera del

VIERNES.”

 

[“It’s Monday again!

At least

the day after

the day after tomorrow

is the eve of

Friday.”]

 

T-Shirts

For a long time, T-shirts have been a rich source of (mainly) witty slogans. My friend Paul produces his own. Here are some examples:

 

Self-promotion:

“Once in a while someone AMAZING comes along …..

and HERE I AM!”

 

On illness:

“No estoy borracho.

¡Tengo PARKINSON!”

 

[“I’m not drunk.

I’ve got PARKINSON’S!”]

 

On xenophobia:

“Je ne suis pas un expat.

IK BEN EEN

VERDOMDE

IMMIGRANT!”

 

[“I’m not an ex-pat.

I’M AN

EFFING

IMMIGRANT!”]

 

On beer:

“BEER

n. [biƏ(r)]

A bitter alcoholic drink

also used for blood transfusion.”

 

“I’m not drunk.

I’m SOCIALLY LUBRICATED!”

 

“GOD MADE MAN,

MAN MADE BEER,

BELGIANS

MADE IT BETTER!”

 

World wide web

Lots of people post uplifting messages and slogans on social media, like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

 

“Para cada minuto que estás enfadado

pierdes 60 segundos de felicidad.”

 

[“For every minute that you spend angry

you are losing 60 seconds of happiness.”]

 

“LA VIDA ES

PARA aquellos

QUE ARRIESGAN, NO

para LOS

QUE LA

VEN PASAR.”

 

[“LIFE IS

FOR those

WHO TAKE RISKS, NOT

for THOSE

WHO JUST WATCH IT

GO BY.”]

 

 

An Irish friend of mine is a regular poster. Here are some examples from her repertoire:

 

Positive, life-affirming:

“This Christmas we don’t need more stuff.

We need more LOVE towards one another.”

 

 

“Life is short.

Take the TRIP,

Buy the SHOES.

Eat the CAKE.”

 

“Stay close to people who feel like sunshine.”

 

Wry humour:

“You know you’re old when you go to bed at the same time you used to go out!”

 

“I couldn’t afford an Ancestry DNA kit,

so I just announced that I had won the Lottery.

I soon found out who all my relatives were.”

 

Poignant:

“Have you ever loved someone so much

that you would have done anything to make them happy

and they just ended up using you …?”

 

With acknowledgements to:

A1 Photo Archive

Facebook

Freida Maybury

Joe King's fridge doors

Paul Darwent

 

© Joe King

 

Tags: A1, Ancestry, Beer, Belgian, Freida Maybury, Facebook, fridge magnet, Joe King, Paul Darwent, Parkinson’s,T-shirt, world wide web, xenophobia



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