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Saw quite a few 'shunts' whilst out driving today. Problem is that after so many dry months the roads have a very thin veneer of rubber on them, and with the rain it can become, in places, almost like ice. One Spanish man ran into the back of another then got out and started to blame the other for having the temerity to be in front of him and stopping ! I didn't hang around to see if the Guardia agreed.....

Spent half an hour on the phone with Movistar today. How difficult is it to understand, I want the same contract but I am changing addresses. Took great pains to give my new address to the young lady who then said, "What is the new house you are going to?" After I thought everything was finally sorted she asked me what contract I wanted ! I reiterated that I wanted the same contract, to which she replied that if I had a new one it would be free but if I took the old contract and number with me it would incur a 50€ cost ! I am considering getting homing pigeons..........!!!

My son's business in the UK continues to be a roaring success, although he had trouble with his first choice of secretary. She kept turning up late so he told her that if she couldn'y arrive at work on time he'd have to get another secretary. She replied, "Another Secretary? Do you think there's enough work for both of us?"

A friend of ours confused her birth control pill with her Valium. She finished up with 10 children but didn't give a damn ! Mind you condoms aren't always safe, a friend was wearing one and he got hit by a lorry !

I think they should make Viagra for women, so that men aren't the only ones having to wait an hour.