I have just stopped at the Benalmadena Pueblo traffic lights. Our side turned green, but we couldn't go because traffic coming the other way blocked the road. The stream of traffic took so long that our green light turned to red before we all could go. Obviously a lot of the traffic coming from the opposite direction had come through the red light. The local police seem to completely ignore this infraction of the law. This situation of vehicles jumping red lights seems endemic to Spain, it has happened to us and to friends many times. Similarly, cars double park in the Pueblo, causing hold ups and the local police just wander by without a care in the world, and seemingly blissfully unaware that they should issue 'illegal' parking tickets to stop people behaving selfishly, and causing situations that could cause accidents. There are plenty of parking alternatives in the Pueblo, but presumably because parking in them might require drivers to walk a bit further, they are totally ignored.
On the subject of madness, two cows standing in a field. One says to the other, "Are you worried about getting 'Mad Cow's Disease'?". The other replies, "Certainly not....it doesn't affect us helicopters".
Wife to husband, "How many woman have you slept with?". The husband replies, "Darling, I don't want to say, you'll only get angry". The wife shook her head, "No, I won't, I promise". "OK then if you insist, let's see, one...two...three...four...you...six...seven...eight...". Apparently her case comes up on Friday...
Frank Bruno suffered from severe insomnia. He went to the doctor. "Right, have you tried counting sheep?" asked the GP. "Yeah, I've tried that but every time I get to nine I get up".
An Irishman (Sorry Paddy) is trying to impress an American as they both visit the Space Centre in Florida. "Of course, Ireland's going to send a man to the Sun soon". "Impossible!" replied the American,"He'd get burned to death!" The Irishman shook his head, "We're not stupid you know. We're sending him at night!"