> Subject: FW: Christmas Cake Recipe!
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> Ingredients:
> 1 cup of water
> 1 tsp baking soda
> 1 Bottle of Brandy
> 1 cup of sugar
> 1 tsp salt
> 1 cup of brown sugar
> Lemon juice
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> 4 Large eggs
> Nuts
> 2 cups of dried fruit
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> Sample the brandy to check quality. Take a large bowl, double check the
> brandy again.
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> To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
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> Repeat.
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> Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
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> Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make
> sure the brandy is shtill OK.
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> Try another cup .... just in case
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> Turn off the mixerer.
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> Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
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> Pick fruit off floor.
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> Mix on the turner.
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> If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a
> sdrewscriver.
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> Sample the brandy to check for tonsisticity.
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> Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who giveshz a shit.
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> Check the brandy.
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> Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
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> Add one table.
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> Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.
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> Greash the oven and pee in the fridge.
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> Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
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> Don't forget to beat off the turner.
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> Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the brandy and kick the dog.
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> Fall into bed.
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> CHERRY MISTMAS!
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>