All EOS blogs All Spain blogs  Start your own blog Start your own blog 

Shall I stay or shall I go?

Here we are in soggy Tunbridge Wells, in a house we hate, but still we can't quite make the decision to leave. This is the story of why we are in this position, and hopefully how eventually we'll change life for the better. Maybe it will ring a few bells with some of you!

So, this is retirement?
Saturday, June 3, 2023 @ 9:31 PM

Okay.

We've been living here now for about 5 months.

Everything is up to date, we have imported one car, and bought another secondhand car. We have our TIEs, and just need to exchange our driving licences.

I've learnt that even if there is a deadline to do something, the Spanish are aware that it's usually not possible, so it's not worth getting stressed about, as long as you're trying to get it all done they're very forgiving.

I've met so many interesting people, from all parts of the world, not just Europe and I've not found anyone I didn't like. 
My main gripe is the lack of purpose in my life. I've always been self employed, an avenue which is not an option on a Non Lucrative Visa. 
I find mysel coming to consciousness every morning, lying there trying to figure out which day it is and wondering how to fill that day.

I know all the options. The possibilities for charity work, for education, for exercise and exploration.

I never was any good at formal education, you can ask my teachers from my grammar school.
I still have my second year report, the first word of which is ATROCIOUS!  It goes on to say that, 'her work, if given in, is rarely on time and never satisfactory'. 
....No, formal learning isn't my thing.

Exercise? Now, I DO like hard physical work, but not exercise just for it's own sake.
There has to be a point to it. For the last 14 years I've worked in the charity shops. I was clearing van loads of junk, moving furniture, hauling sacks, happy as a pig in muck, but running on a treadmill? No thanks.

Exploration and travel? Nah!
Not that interested in what's the other side of the hill. If I really want to know I can watch a travel show.

So, this is how things are at the moment . I'm sure in time I'll find my niche, but at present, -  I am a bit bored.

Not completely sure retirement is my thing.

 



Like 2




11 Comments


PablodeRonda said:
Tuesday, June 6, 2023 @ 12:23 PM

Hey! Well done, you guys. You've sorted everything out and now you're here. That's some achievement in this day and age. I did it years ago, when you didn't need an income, health care nor a non lucrative visa. It was a relative doddle.

Retirement is tricky. I retired early at 55, and thought, despite all the advice to get a hobby, volunteer for something, etc etc, I thought: "Nah, I'll be fine!"

But I wasn't. I'd always wanted to emigrate to Spain, and when I met a lady here who was to become my second wife, I thought I'd cracked it. I moved here at the age of 58, got married at 60, moved to our dream home at 61, and then ... it all went downhill. I felt depressed and aimless for several years until the dreadful thing that was Covid-19 knocked some sense into me. Since then I've been very active, with my fingers in several pies. I'm now 73 and enjoying my "old age".

PS. I agree with you about pointless exercise. I started jogging in my 30s - I lasted a week!

You need to make sure you miss out the depression phase I went through and get cracking on giving yourself that purpose that you seek.

Good luck!


Radam said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 9:03 AM

It sounds like you are hard working! Have you tried exploring your area through hiking? Moving to a new country can be exciting, and maybe walking around where you live could be fun! Good luck!


Radam said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 9:03 AM

It sounds like you are hard working! Have you tried exploring your area through hiking? Moving to a new country can be exciting, and maybe walking around where you live could be fun! Good luck!


anthomo16 said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 11:39 AM

I think a lot of us have been there - now don't do anything for anybody else just for yourself i.e. whatever you did in your own business whether painter, plasterer, accountant, builder etc. etc. etc. I am sure there are people out there who are struggling and would be delighted with your help for free. Your own knowledge will help others and you will get to know so many more people. Just advertise yourself. you will see.


domhalcon said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 11:41 AM

I'm 60 and have also been concerned about the lack of purpose side of retirement.

I decided to go for an encore career and have just completed my training as a retirement coach. I need to do more hours to get my full certification so would be happy to do some free sessions on zoom around "purpose and meaning" if you are interested.


oldjonesey said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 12:04 PM

Buy an old MG mate- there aren't enough hours in the day to keep them running, and very rarely you might actually be able to drive somewhere in them and then meet interesting people when they break down... :-(


oldjonesey said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 12:29 PM

I should have said m'am not mate -poor typing skills I know!


Knoydart said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 2:42 PM

I wonder what your dream home is like?
Years ago I read, re moving to Spain; "... make sure that all is done before you move".
Having bought an impressive townhouse in 2008 with views across "the pool and campo" I spent years getting it ready. In the process, neighbours said; "don't leave it too long before you move!" In the meantime, BREXIT has impacted on our goal. So, since you're there, the some time just to consider how lucky you are!


Ten66 said:
Saturday, June 10, 2023 @ 4:28 PM

HI, retired 55, moved out same year, now 12 years later and realise, I have never had enough time to do what I wanted to do.

Yes, I have forgotten what day of the week it is , no not because of drink, :), It is because it does not matter (Sundays excepted when the shops are shut and I forget what day it is :) )

I can offer no guidance, well maybe some thoughts, I do what I like to do and whenever I like it do it. I am lucky. Just need more time.

I hope it comes together, help people sort their gardens, paint peoples house, their grills, take folk to hospitals appointments, listen to them, just be a great person that they all say, wow, he/she is wonderful, dropped everything and helped us out.
Be a great mate, you will than have loads of time to sit and chat with all your new friends.

Just don't get paid,




Smurph said:
Sunday, June 11, 2023 @ 7:09 PM

You could try learning Spanish. I don't know how old you are but it's never to late to learn - an old cliche but very true. You may find classes locally and there are online courses and of course Duolingo. A couple of hours every day and you'd be able to chat with your Spanish neighbours.
And you could write a blog about your efforts.
Failing this - how about that book you've been meaning to write?


Feia3 said:
Monday, June 12, 2023 @ 6:08 PM

Hello, this tread is interesting for many expatriates. Being on pension in Spain, I am doing a lot of things mentioned here. But I felt that it is also a good idea that domhalcon mentioned about being a pension coach. I would like to know, if possible, where have you been educated in this profession, domhalcon?

Thanks.


Only registered users can comment on this blog post. Please Sign In or Register now.




 

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse you are agreeing to our use of cookies. More information here. x