Relief On The Golf Course

A message to the "gentleman" who at approx 11:15 this morning decided to get his little weeny out and relieve himself at the side of the 11th tee. There are tolilets around the course and it would be more private to use one of these in the future. Today you were in full view of the penthouses and we nearly dropped our binoculars at what we saw - not that their magnification was anything like good enough to see anything so small but - you'll kill the grasses you p***ed on and children and families may be offended by such disgusting behaviour. A shame the german shepherd that is allowed to run free over the golf course in the evenings wasn't on hand to take a bite ! Anyway lets try to lift the basic levels of decency up a notch shall we? Hopefully you'll read this and feel a little shame, but I doubt it.

I'm absolutely flabbergasted that someone would do this, do they not have any decency? Obviously not! Hope they do read this and feel very ashamed of themselves. Perhaps you should let Mileniun know about this. Would you recognise him (not his weeny!) if you saw him again?

Condado Police have compiled a image of the offender. If seen do not approach, he is armed with a loaded Weeny!

He must have been doing it all over the bloody golf course over the last two years. Now I know why we have all those bare, barren areas !!

Regards,

Kev,

How are you mate, I am keeping those blues on their toes on the football post.

Its a good job it wasnt me you saw havin a pee. When I was a teenager my fairy godmother appeared and said she was going to grant me one wish from two options, I could either have a very large nudger or a very long memory....... I dont remember which option I chose!!

Cheers, Dakey

Kev

A story which might help as a deterent.

Before we bought in Condado about 4 years ago, me and three mates used to anually play the courses at La Manga. 2 of the courses, North & South, are lush green parkland style and the West is beautiful forest style. One of the guys was suffering from prostate trouble and on about the 15th hole on the last day, playing the West course was desperate for a pee. No one infront and no one behind us he decided to go into the bushes. 30 seconds later he let out a big girly scream like Ned Flanders in the Simpsons and came running out zipping himself up. He was followed by a wet "Horeshoe Whipsnake"

After quick retreat and completion of the game playing only balls lying on the fairway, we spoke to a couple of the greenkeepers at the 19th hole. They were as clued up as David Attenborough on the 13 different types of snake in Murcia and telling us 5 of which were venemous. They even had some photos in the hut which enabled us to identify "big bernard" our Horeshoe Whipsnake

When my mate recalls the story now, its length is increasing 6"each year.

If you see anyone taking a Jimmy riddle in the future, just start hissing ha ha

Dave

Dave,

I bet that was some stand off, A horseshoe whipsnake facing a one eyed trouser snake! who blinked first?

Dakey

Dave,

I think we might have the self same snakes here at Condado. When we were there at the beginning of the month there was a snake about 3 feet long in the roadthat had been splattered by a car on the roundabout on the way down to Al Kasar. Beware when you go hunting for balls in the long grass !!

Perhaps this should be posted around the golf course, last seen between security and the Isla, just sitting on the pavement. It should be an effective deterrent!

If anyone knows what it is (other than a snake) please enlighten me! It was taken last October.

Looks to me to be most similar to the Lataste's Viper which isn't good news as they're venonous. Take a look on this link for snakes native to Spain.

http://www.ruralspain.info/snakesinspain.htm

Well there's an incentive to keep it non the fairway!!

I was going to post a picture of the one eyed trouser snake, but then thought better of it.

Dakey

Thought they called that one in the picture................The Tevezona !!

That picture bares a tremendous likeness of "Big Bernard" !!! I'd better not tell my mate Ted, his story will become a lot scarier

I was going to post a picture of the one eyed trouser snake, but then thought better of it.

Dakey

You got a good zoom lens on ya camera then Dakey lad???